From the feedback I received from the class, I first started by fixing the type detailing which amounted to taking out a few sentences in the article to save space for other elements of the design. I felt it was quite difficult to improve on the rag of the body copy, given the vast amount of fairly long words and names that were in the article. I was uncertain about changing the scale of the cherry tree because I wanted to keep a certain amount of negative space in the overall design, as well as wanting the title to stand out. I also changed the colour setting of the cherry tree illustration in Photoshop from RGB to CMYK which is what setting it would be printed in.
With the title on the first page, I also received feedback that it wasn’t legible enough because the black was disguised by the dark colours in the cherry tree. I explored other ways of making the title stand out in front of the illustration to make it more legible. This included making use of physical materials like chalk and paint as I had done with the typography on the second double page spread.
However, I preferred the use of the digital text that was created in the InDesign document. To improve the legibility of digital text I copied the text, changed the colour to white and placed it behind the black text. As you can see with the design below on the right, I flipped the cherry tree horizontally to direct the viewer to reading into the text. This made a better path for the eye.
I decided that the text still wasn’t legible enough to read. By looking back at research I conducted in editorial designs I found online, I started to look at how the titles were placed on the page. Many of them didn’t have images behind them, however I thought about making the text look highlighted. I created rectangular shapes to fit with the width and height of the title to place behind the text. I decided to change the colour of the title to white to allow me to use black filled boxes behind.
Other feedback I received was expanding where the roots went. I considered spreading the roots so they travelled across the double page, but also into the second double page spread. I quickly drew some dark coloured roots to match with the bark on the trunk. To bring the concept of the cherry tree further, I filled the second single page with cherry red behind as well.
For the final double spread I only decided to minimise the amount of text I had on the page and to change the pull quote to lower case and decrease the point size.